Wednesday, November 15, 2006

9 Things I Hate About Everyone

9 Things I Hate About Everyone

1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time.... I knowwhere my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch whenI ask where the toilet is?

2. People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room forthe T.V. remote because they refuse to walk to the T.V. and change thechannel manually.

3. When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". Damnright! What good is cake if you can't eat it?

4. When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is.Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people dothis? Who and where are they? Gonna kick their asses!

5. When people say, while watching a film, "Did you see that?". No, Loser, Ipaid $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the damn floor.

6. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?".... Didn't really give me achoice there, did ya, Sunshine?

7. When something is "new and improved!"...Which is it? If it's new, thenthere has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then theremust have been something before it, so it couldn't be new.

8. When people say "life is short". What the hell?? Life is the longest damnthing anyone ever experiences!! What can you do that's longer?

9. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus comeyet?". If the bus came would I be standing here, Dumb-ass?

Monday, November 13, 2006

Christmas Lights go Bling Bling

"The rhythm of the weekend, with its birth, its planned gaieties, and its announced end, followed the rhythm of life and was a substitute for it." -Fitzgerald, F. Scott

Wow that line was so moving, it moved me like a man moves a woman. I almost shed a tear, fortunately I was able to muster the essence of machismo in my body down to the last drop or else I would've wept like a sissy girl. I am not a sissy girl, I'm a man -- a macho man!

Weekends are my consolation. It's a transient sanctuary from my sordid existence as a consequence of work. I dont hate my work, it's my source of doe. With it, I am able to maintain my baller lifestyle, I get to pimp my ride bit by bit, I am able to buy bling-bling stuff and cool rags, and I get to wax some hoes. Hahaaaay(Sigh in bisaya)! Its the perfunctory mundaneness of it that kicks me in the generative glands area(nuts), hence I turn red and can't breathe. SO I eat... and weep. But I'm not a sissy girl! Anyway, weekend is my time to breathe. I'm kinda like a diver-like person, who's been diving underwater for like 5 days straight without any SCUBA (self-contained underwater breathing apparatus) and weekend is my chance to surface for air and see the beauty of the world: sky, clouds, cute little birds, STARVUXZ, trees, flowers, warm air entering my nostrils, bikini babes, Havaianas, and the likes... And feel. Then I dive back into the murky water for 5 days, again.

I had such a wonderful surfacing last weekend. Last saturday I was able to work out during our pre-sportsfest badminton practice. It was a great feeling to be able to sweat and move a lot. Although it was very evident that my athletic prowess was not the same as before, I still had fun. We played from 8 to 11 it was a badminton buffet, play all you can. Then on sunday a knock on the door woke me up. I wonder what it was gently rapping, rapping at my chamber door.`'Tis some visitor,' I muttered, `tapping at my chamber door -Only this, and nothing more. But the knocking didn't cease, "who could this be at this time of day?", I said to myself.

"I don't know. Let's go check it out," my self replied.

"Ok let's check it out, my precious," I answered back with a grin.

I opened the door, it was Hazel. She was a bit early today(9:30AM), usually she arrives at 11:00AM when she visits me on a sunday. I asked her why, she said she just missed me -- her eyes said the same. She grows ever so beautiful everytime I see her. We hugged for about a couple minutes.

As usual we went on an unplanned date. In the jeepney we decided to go to Sto. Nino to attend mass. After the mass we went to our favorite department store near Sto. Nino, I dont know its name but it's kinda like a surplus store where everything is cheap. They sell pirated i pods for only Php500. The resemblance was uncanny. You could fool someone into thinking it was a real i pod if you were jogging or something like that. I did not buy one coz I'm cool, I am not into jologs stuff. They even sell pirated Havaianas. I was so insulted, how dare they mock our beloved tsinelas. I could not make myself look at it long enough, hence I did not catch the name. Maybe it was one of those homonymns to fool uninitiated consumers, like: Javaianas, J instead of H, or maybe Havayanas, Y instead of I. It made me so sick to the bone marrow. It was blasphemy. I was really blogging mad. If I find those responsible for this atrocious act I'll say to there faces, " Blog you! You mother-bloggers! " Bang! Bang! Bang! Bullet to the head.

After battling our way through the crowd we finally got out. I bought a study lamp, and christmas lights all for Php75. Hazel bought a ceiling fan for only Php54 . What an Offa! Then we decided to head back home. On the way home Hazel smiled at me playfully, she wanted to go videoke so we went to the Country Mall, the store where everything is. Hazel loved it when I was singing Feelings, then she sang The Power of Love... Sometimes I'm frightened but I'm ready to learn of the Power of Love... Orezzz tanan!

Finally we got tired of singing our hearts out. We ate then we went back to my boarding house. I was really excited because of my new christmas lights. I plugged it in the outlet, it worked. Then we started to argue. I wanted to place the lights arround my bed so it would look cool. It would be a christmas bed--a pimped bed. It would be blinking while I sleep. But she wanted to place it on the wall in a shape of a christmas tree. How clichic. What a stereotypical notion of christmas. So, I gave in, besides her idea made more sense. So we were taping it on the wall, here a tape, there a tape everywhere a tape tape. Oh my Gosh! Its more difficult than I thought. Halfway through our endeavour, "Little Christmas Tree" by Jose Mari Chan came on the radio. Have you ever imagined that your life had a background music suited for your current temperament, and you sing that song in your head? J.M. Chan's song was perfect for the moment Hazel and I were in. We sang along while we finished our christmas tree. I felt like I was in a movie--a Christmas Romantic Comedy.

We sat there, holding hands, marvelling at our masterpiece. We were so proud of our creation, athough it was no better than a grade schooler's work, because it was created with the grace of love, plus we had a theme song. I have never seen any christmas light blink so happily. It was the best christmas light show I have ever seen--Christmas is in the air.

Even at my age I still believe in the magic of christmas and it is amplified and catalyzed because I'm in love. This is the same feeling when I was a child, when everything was so grand and marvelous, even the simple was amazing and wonderful. That simple christmas light showed me a truth I have long forgotten--to find beauty in simplicity. I guess Christmas teaches us to be children once again: to love sincerely, to be happy, and to feel, no matter how fleeting. At that moment, I was a kid again! "Silent Night" was playing on the radio by now. Thank you Ghost of Christmas Past.

Thursday, November 09, 2006

Aside from being a Pro Blogger...


Besides Pro Blogging, I also draw during my free time. Here are some of my older sketches: http://philipgripo.deviantart.com/gallery/

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

Constipated Regular AWS Employee

"KA-ME HA-ME WAAAAAVE!" This is my mantra when I am constipated. I push at the "WAAAAAVE" part, it works. Shugoi(ACTION 7 Cebu expression)!!!

I had a bad morning today. I woke up with a sore throat, an aching head, clogged nostrils, and to top it off, I had constipation. Damn you, Shawarma! Constipation hurts just like love. If you try so hard "it" would bleed just like the heart, hence one should relax and let go, for If you really love her you gotta set her free... Anyway, the previous sentence has no implication whatsoever on my in-a-relationship life. You might think that there is a juicy chika material between the lines, unfortunately there is none. Constipation hurts, love also hurts, therefore, through transitivity Love is Constipation.

I was dragging myself to work this morning. I didn't feel like working, I just wanted to relax and listen to birds, and admire the cloud formations, and sleep with my Havies on, then maybe later do some interpretative dancing on the rooftop wearing my pink leotard, as a tribute to mother nature. FYI, I got Regularized yesterday. There is nothing special about me anymore, I am now merely regular. If I were a Batchoi I would have no egg, good thing I'm not a Batchoi. I have become a full-pledged Corporate Slave. Anyway, all my sufferings to get to work vanished as I reached PDI Condominium. I looked up and there she was, across the street, in her white lingerie.

I was looking at her face intently and she was looking back at mine, as I waited for the street lights to switch to red. Then her lips moved, I swear they moved. I could not hear what she was saying, because it was very noisy, but I could make out what she was trying to say by reading her lips. She said, "Ako ka! Ako ka! Ako ka!" (You're mine! You're mine! You're mine!). Then the red light diverted my attention from her. I crossed the street, her lips weren't moving anymore. Was that for real? Did she really desire me? Did she really say "ako ka!"(you're mine) or maybe "Bakukang"(beetle), as she was describing the gay pedestrian behind me that looked like one? I don't know. I'm confused. I'm so helpless. I can't do anything. Help me Joe D' Mango!

Although a prospect of a steamy romance was impossible, it was enough to stimulate my adrenal glands to secrete adrenaline, and my generative glands to secrete testosterone. I felt like a man oozing with testosterone, plus my morning dreariness was gone. I'm ready to face my first day as a Regular AWS Employee and a Pro Blogger.

If you're intrigued about the girl in white lingirie click this link so you would understand why it was impossible between us: http://i106.photobucket.com/albums/m267/philipgripo/Image1274.jpg Besides, my girl is much more beautiful. Love you Haze.

Sunday, November 05, 2006

Sweet Embrace



Unfortunately, Nov. 2(All Soul's Day) was not a holiday... You ask me what it was? It was a blessing in disguise. RC was back in AWS Cebu after his 3-month Japan OB Trip. He gave me a Brand New Second-Hand Top-of-the-Line IBM Optical Mouse and a bag of Country Ma'am cookies. I was intrigued by this particular cookie brand since, at one omeyage skirmish, Sensei was asking me, in his C3P0-like voice: "Give me country ma'am! Give me country ma'am." His voice had a subliminal effect. I was brain-washed into craving for country ma'am.

Anyway, as gratitude, I gave RC what he wanted the most, some love. I gave him a huge hug which he enjoyed so much. In the picture RC is the guy seated. You can clearly see that he is savoring every moment of my tender yet firm embrace, even closing his eyes to shut himself from the world to feel every sensation in his body as he is engulfed in my powerful arms. He was in a state of "SUPER KILIGness". His smile was that of peace and security for he knows that I am holding him tight and I will never let go. I will keep him warm on cold summer nights. Char! hihihihi... Thanks Bai. I know gikilig jud ka ato, kay ako man sad gikilig.

The love between RC and I is exclusively platonic.

Thursday, November 02, 2006

Zhang Ziyi, Im just kidding...

I haven't been able to post any decent blog these past three days, I've been kinda busy with halloween and stuff. Char! November 1 was all saint's day. It's the time of year(for some it's the only time of year), when people visit their dead relatives in the cemetery. They offer candles and flowers(I think candles and preayers would be enough), then they party all night long with booze and loud music. Later on in the night, if the action gets hotter, there would be some stabbing and some brawling for onlookers' delight.

In my case, I spent the holiday like any other cool guy would, I spent it with my girl, Hazel. We went to Ayala to hang out at StarVucks to buy a coffee shake or two, then maybe later buy some Havaianas (pronounced ah-vai-YAH-nas), Portuguese for Hawaiians, Havies as we fondly call it, cause it's the World's Best Rubber Flip Flops. We use it for Tumba Lata or Tumbang Preso in tagalog, sometimes when it's rainy outside and the canal is flooded we'd go out and do a little competition, we'd race our Havaianas in the flood current. The first to reach the culvert is the winner. Then we say bye-bye to our Havies. We have so much fun with our Havies. Too bad Ayala was close, so we went to SM instead. At SM we watched The Banquet, starring Ziyi Zhang, and other chinese guys and gals. If your expecting an action-filled movie with lots of fight scenes with flying warriors flailing their swords, you'll be disappointed. It is 80% drama 20% action. I expected lots of flying warriors but I wasn't disappointed. It was a well-made tragic love story. I liked it. I almost cried at the end... I wanted my money back. Zhang Ziyi, if your reading this blog I'm just kidding!

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Peace

Blogging is best with peace and quiet...